关于长篇英语笑话阅读.docx

关于长篇英语笑话阅读关于长篇英语笑话：AuntKaren'sMoralTheteachergaveherfifthgradeclassanassignment...Gettheirparentstotellthemastorywithamoralattheendofit.Thenextdaythekidscamebackandonebyonebegantotelltheirstories.Ashleysaid,"Myfather'safarmerandwehavealotofegg-layinghens.Onetimeweweretakingoureggstomarketinabasketonthefrontseatofthecarwhenwehitabigbumpintheroadandalltheeggswentflyingandbrokeandmadeamess.""What'sthemoralofthestory?"askedtheteacher."Don'tputallyoureggsinonebasket!""Verygood,"saidtheteacher.NextlittleSarahraisedherhandandsaid,"Ourfamilyarefarmerstoo.Butweraisechickensforthemeatmarket.Wehadadozeneggsonetime,butwhentheyhatchedweonlygottenlivechicks,andthemoraltothisstoryis,"don'tcountyourchickensbeforethey'rehatched.""ThatwasafinestorySarah.Michael,doyouhaveastorytoshare?""Yes,mydaddytoldmethisstoryaboutmyAuntKaren.AuntKarenwasaflightengineerintheGulfWarandherplanewashit.Shehadtobailoutoverenemyterritoryandallshehadwasabottleofwhisky,amachinegunandamachete.Shedrankthewhiskyonthewaydownsoitwouldn'tbreakandthenshelandedrightinthemiddleof100enemytroops.Shekilledseventyofthemwiththemachinegununtilsheranoutofbullets.Thenshekilledtwentymorewiththemacheteuntilthebladebroke.Thenshekilledthelasttenwithherbarehands.""Goodheavens,"saidthehorrifiedteacher,"whatkindofmoraldidyourdaddytellyoufromthathorriblestory?""Staythef#ckawayfromAuntKarenwhenshe'sbeendrinking"关于长篇英语笑话：Women'sInstructionsNeverdohousework.Nomanevermadelovetoawomanbecausethehousewasspotless.Rememberyouareknownbytheidiotyouaccompany.Don'timagineyoucanchangeaman-unlesshe'sindiapers.Whatdoyoudoifyourboyfriendwalksout?Youshutthedoor.Somanymen-somanyreasonsnottosleepwithanyofthem.Iftheycanputamanonthemoon-theyshouldbeabletoputthemallthere.Tellhimyou'renothistype-youhaveapulse.Neverletyourman'smindwander-itstoolittletobeleftoutalone.Goforyoungermen.Youmightaswell-theynevermatureanyway.Nevermarryamanformoney.You'llhavetoearneverypenny.Definitionofabachelor:Amanwhohasmissedtheopportunitytomakesomewomanmiserable.Thebestwayto