大学英语六级写作经典范文及点评.doc

大学英语六级写作经典范文及点评

1.大学生自我创业已经不是一个新鲜的话题了。那么自我创业有何利，又有何弊呢?看过本文之后你就知道了。或许这对面临毕业的你还是个不小的帮助呢!
Selfemployment
Selfemploymentcouldbringmanyadvantages.Oneoftheadvantagesofbeingself-employedisthattheprofitthebusinessmakesbelongstotheowner.Iftheself-employedpersonsucceedsinbusiness,hehasthechancetoearnagreatdealofmoney.Theprofitearnedistherewardfortheowner’seffort,abilityandcreativity.Thus,asecondadvantageisthataperson’sintelligenceandabilitieshaveadirecteffectontheearnings.Athirdadvantageofbeingself-employedisthatapersoncancontrolhisworkinghours.Whilenotallself-employedpeoplearecompletelyfree,mostofthemhavemorecontroloverthisareathanthesalariedpeople.
However,beingself-employedisnotwithoutproblems.First,beingone’sownbossplacestheresponsibilitydirectlyonthatindividualshoulders.Everyonehassomeweaknessesinacertainaspects.Theseweaknesseswillaffecthowsuccessfulaself-employedpersonis.Second,thoughtheself-employedcanearnconsiderableprofitswithasuccessfulbusiness,lossescanforcethemoutofbusinessandsometimes,placethemindebt.Athirddisadvantageconcernsincomesecurity.Self-employedpeoplehavenoguaranteedwage.Theirearningscanvarygreatly,dependingonbusinessconditions.Salariedpeople,however,cangenerallycountoncontinuedearnings.Inaddition,salariedpeopleoftenenjoyfringebenefitsthatmeangreaterpeaceofmind.Oneofthesebenefitsmaybeinsurancepaidforbytheemployerthatcontinuestheemployee’ssalaryintheeventofsicknessoraccidentwhilemanyself-employedpeopledonothavesuchprotection①.
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行文点评
文章结构简单明了。第一段阐述了自我创业的3个好处。第二段分析了自我创业所存在的问题。
两段中“first,second,third”的使用，不仅使文章在句式上显得条理分明，更在内容上体现了连贯性。
词汇斟酌
indebt负债
counton指望，依靠
fringea.附加的，额外的;边缘的
佳句临摹
①【注释】intheeventofsth万一;倘若
【临摹】IntheeventofhisdeathSheliawillinheritthemoney.一旦他故去，希拉就会继承这笔钱。
思如泉涌
Somethingattempted,somethingdone.有尝试就会有收获。
Actionsspeaklouderthanwords.行动胜于语言。
有些人并非特别聪明，却能得到大家的认可和支持。我们说这些人有个人魅力。个人魅力不仅源于聪明、诚实等优秀品质，还源于与他人交往时的态度和技巧。
CommunicatingaSenseofPersonalPower
Communicatingasenseofpersonalpowercomesfromabeliefthatyoucanreachyourgoalsinyourownw